The Bard’s Tale is a “play your own adventure”-type game, where you play the role of a bard. A roguish, scoundrel, womanizing bard with questionable moral character, granted, but a bard none the less. This bard has been tossed out to make his way in the world because of all the bad things he did to his villagers as a child and youngster. He’s not seeking fame and fortune, as these would be actual goals for someone to have and the Bard is too lazy for that. He’s looking for one thing only … his own pleasure. It’s because of this particular quest for all things pleasurable that the game earns its “T” rating. The humor is bawdy, the women overly buxom, and the conversations between the Bard and women are suggestive enough as to leave no doubt in one’s mind what happens when the scenes “fade to black.” But it is this humor and interaction which makes the game so much fun. You sometimes can choose to give a “nice” response or a “snarky” one in a particular dialogue, and the gameplay does change based on those responses, but even the “nice” response is often highly sarcastic. Listening to the Narrator harass the Bard, and the Bard snip back at the Narrator often left me laughing so hard that my family looked sideways at me as though I were crazy. Yet another good reason to play the game late at night, if you have children in your house.

Gameplay itself is very linear, and not all that difficult. There’s little strategy involved in getting past combat situations where your primary choice is what creature to summon and which sword to use. But as the combat system really isn’t the point of this game, I didn’t mind much. I do wish that the perspective on the game wasn’t always the top down point of view. While the Bard’s head isn’t bad to look at, I would have felt more immersed in the storyline if I could be looking at the world from his viewpoint. I’m very grateful that the trees and foliage “disappear” around the Bard as he travels, because trying to see what is beating on him would have been nearly impossible otherwise, but it really would have been more fun to see the world, and the women, through his eyes. As I said earlier, there isn’t too much need to think as you are playing this game.

You learn different tunes as you make your way through the story, and these tunes allow you to summon different creatures along the way. But for the most part once you’ve earned The Crone (healer), you’ll have her summoned, and just change out what other creatures you’ve summoned. You can choose from a list of abilities as well, but again it is usually pretty obvious which ability you want to learn and when, with little variation. For example, if you are nice to the dog in Houton, you’ll want to learn Dog Training as soon as possible to give yourself another combat buddy. I confess that I looked up a walkthrough online for the game and used it. I wanted to get to the content of the game so much - to see the cut scenes, hear the jokes, and find out what was actually going to happen to the Bard - bad enough that I didn’t care if I “cheated” my way through combats just to get to the good parts.

To be honest, playing The Bard’s Tale was a lot like reading a fun fantasy novel that you just can’t put down. I just had to get past the next combat like I’d have to turn the next page to find out what happened next. I don’t want to give too much away, but you’ve just got to see the singing Trow that lets you know it’s “Unlucky to be you.” And a visit to the tavern in Kirkwall will leave you chuckling repeatedly with other gamer friends. It is little treats like this which make The Bard’s Tale so much fun to play. You’ll find yourself wanting your friends to play the game too, just so you can laugh together about the game. You’ll find you don’t care when your Bard is defeated, because it is funny to listen to the Narrator’s commentary. It is even fun to just leave the Bard sitting in one place for a while until the Narrator pipes up and “redirects” the storyline. This game is so packed with little extras like that, I’m sure I’ve missed many of them this first time through, which is another reason I want my friends to play it. It isn’t a challenging game to play mentally or physically. It won’t leave you feeling as though you’ve just “beaten” a new game, or conquered a virtual world somewhere. But the game has kept me laughing for hours now, and that’s something I just have to share with others, and for that reason I highly recommend it to any adult looking for amusement.